How could alcohol be so much more important than our family?
One of the most heartbreaking discussions we had in his first rehab facility as a couple, was why would you take such a beautiful family, and all we had worked for, and risk it all for a drink? Why and how could alcohol be so much more important than our family?
The drink had become his poison.
Years later, in our couples therapy, before we began, she said they treat families of alcoholics and their relationship like the person had an affair, an affair with a drink. They do this because he was putting his needs before all others, and the drink had become his poison. This helped me put into perspective what had happened all the years before, and why neglect, isolation, manipulation, and lies had become commonplace. And when I spoke up about it, I was quickly silenced or made to feel like something was wrong with me. This can really play mind tricks on you, and mess with your ability to think clearly.
We were like a picture of a Hallmark family on a puzzle.
I struggled coming to terms constantly asking myself, how and why would he put the drink before his wife, his children, his family? I remember saying at the rehab facility, crying in desperation wanting an answer… “Why would you take such a beautiful family… We were like a picture of a Hallmark family on a puzzle, and just decide one day to SHAKE THE PUZZLE so violently, all the pieces begin to get lost? That family is now gone.”
I fought and fought for years trying to put that exact Hallmark puzzle image back together, piece by piece. As I struggled over time, and years later finally surrendered, and gave it up to God, I understood that not only was this out of my hands, but instead a new picture puzzle was being created. One that I never thought possible, or even gave a chance to be created.
This new picture was created, and it’s even more beautiful than the first.
I fought so hard for the old, I wasn’t willing to let go, and embrace the new picture. This new picture- my husband and I, along with our children- put together piece by piece, one by one. With every mistake, hug, laugh, smile, cry- this new picture was created. It is perfectly imperfect. And it’s even more beautiful than the first.
Let go of the past. Do not be afraid to embrace the new. VoicesInCourage.com will help you get to your new future that you may not even be aware is already starting to come together for you. Let go and have faith. Join the movement and find a brighter future.
Launching Fall 2021.